Sunday Evening in May


Clematis apparently thrive on hail, freezing temperatures, and snow.

It’s Sunday night, which is one of my favorites in retired life.  I take Mondays off.  I don’t need to get up early in the morning even though I do it anyway.  But I always know I have one day a week that I could sleep in if I ever wanted to.

I’ve now had a week to “process” my osteoporosis diagnosis.  I am no further along in the process of the processing.  I’m a bit angry about it.  In my life whenever I am facing a problem, I do research.  I study.  I read.  In the days of the internet, I look for others’ experiences.

So, I have found out that osteoporosis is caused by a bunch of things that are N/A for me.  I am not thin.  I am not a smoker.  I do not drink.  I get TONS of exercise.  I eat well.  I calculated my normal calcium intake, and it is very high, as well as other nutrients that the research would tell me I am short of.  My vitamin D level came back fine.

I have found that I should be doing weight bearing exercise.  I have searched for a definition of weight bearing.  The jury is apparently out on that.  One thing they all seem to agree on is walking being good.  And the rest is all up for debate.  One study says swimming is good, others say that research has shown that competitive swimmers suffer bone loss.  The same thing for biking.  Weight training is supposed to be good, but some say it isn’t really good.  Trampoline sales companies work hard to convince that jumping on a trampoline is the answer.  The cite NASA astronauts having used them.  But when you really look into that, it appears the astronauts used tramps to simulate weightlessness before they went into space, not to rebuild bone mass after returning from weightlessness.

I am absolutely dumbfounded by the dearth of information and the fact that almost all of it contradicts each other.

I am becoming convinced that it is because of the demographic.  Old White Women? Who cares?  Seriously, who the hell cares?

My doctor, who I once adored, is doing things that are not indicative of competence. I had to go to the pharmacy three times after she said she’d order the medication.  Each time, she said she was ordering it, but it didn’t get ordered.  She gave me NO information on this thing other than telling me I have it and suggesting I start fosamax.  Amazing since she has never prescribed a drug for me – ever.   She also noted in my chart that I have significant bone loss.  OK.

You do know that I will get there.  I will process this.  I will figure out what to do.  It may just be to accept that this is my lot in life.  I can do that, but probably not today.

Thankfully, I take the Eucharist to the homebound on Sunday Mornings.  Oh, how I love those old people!  They seem to like me too.  And when I am with them, I am not thinking about myself.

I can be grateful for so many wonderful things in my life:

  • I belong to a church where I really truly belong.
  • Yesterday I attended the 34th AA birthday of one of my dearest friends at my old homegroup.  Sitting in that room with my peers in AA is an assurance that all is well.
  • It’s easy enough to say “that’s my new homegroup, because that is where I belong.”
  • The extreme and severe weather may be over for now.  I can plant my vegetable garden this week.
  • My home is my home.  It is mine.
  • When my furnace stopped working last week, I got on the phone and got a new one.  I just wrote the check to pay for it because I actually had the money.
  • I do not have to drive across town to go to a job tomorrow.  YIPPEEE!
  • My sponsor is coming to town tomorrow.  YIPPEEEE!
  • And I get to see a former blogger on Saturday.  YIPPEEEE!

See?  Life really is good.

This entry was posted in Aging, Gratitude, Health, Osteoporosis. Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to Sunday Evening in May

  1. atomicmomma says:

    Mary…good to hear from you! I think you are right to be frustrated over all the conflicting information on osteoporosis. Please google “How A Bone Disease Grew To Fit The Prescription” and NPR together and you’ll find a worrisome article about why you’re so confused.

    I’m still saying the Rosary daily. It brings me such peace and humbles me. I recite it at night, the last thing I do before I go to bed. It’s having a profound effect on me.

    Wonderful that you take the Eucharist to the homebound. That is truly doing the work of Jesus.

    • Thanks so much for that info. I looked it up last night. Apparently fosamax does help those with osteoporosis, but the demographic was too small to make any money on it. They found a way to expand the indication to “osteopenia,” a totally new disorder (which many would call normal aging) and then convinced Medicare and Medicaid to pay for new diagnostic tests that would find all these future consumers of this medication. Fabulous!

      I’m so glad to hear that you are praying the Rosary. I have been doing that, it is amazing the effect it has.

  2. Melissa says:

    If you’re having doubts about your doctor, your might want to switch to one you do trust if you can. I don’t know much about osteoporosis (other than my bone density test came back with issues as well, but so far not bad enough for meds). But, I do know that It’s hard enough facing the physical changes we encounter as we get older without the additional worry of having to double/triple check everything your doctor does or doesn’t do. (Of course, that being said, I think we’ve all had that lost-prescription thing happen–In my experience it’s the nurses who call in meds, so it might well be the nurse who’s a few chicken nuggets short of a Happy Meal.)

    I love your gratitude list–it’s a good reminder to me. When I can turn my gaze from problems to blessings I always feel better (so why are those problems so much fun to focus on? SIGH)

    (I don’t usually comment, but I check your blog every morning for a new post!)

    • Melissa, thanks so much for commenting! I so appreciate it.

      “A few nuggets short of a happy meal” ha ha ha, I love it. You are right though that it might be someone other than my doc. Even the pharmacy techs expressed shock that Dr. B.’s orders weren’t in because she is usually so good. I’m not happy with her right at this moment, but I don’t think I want to go back to the doc I had for 20 + years. I liked him, I thought he was good, but he started throwing meds at everything. And then meds to counter the meds. I didn’t want to go down that road, so I was lucky enough to find my new doctor who practices functional medicine. We talk about gut bacteria rather than proton pump inhibitors, etc.

      Again, thanks.

      • Melissa says:

        The couple of times I commented in the past I used another email address and the name (Lulu). Funny, but it didn’t even occur to me to do that this time. Apparently, I’m a bit more out about being in recovery than I was back then. LOL.

        As I searched for my previous couple of comments as Lulu, I again saw the post about your mother and being a mother (this:

        I remember thinking then (and thought it again as rereading) that I could have written that, except my mother died in her mid sixties of emphysema and I don’t yet have any grandkids. But the age gap in my family, the older brother whose behavior lead to me hiding any negative stuff in my life from my parents, and the emotional distance I kept with my husband and kids, and the continuing struggle with that tendency…

        I want to let you know that that blogpost was very helpful in changing my attitude about myself. I think up until that point I’d assumed that my tendency to keep people at arm’s-length was because I was just not a very warm and open person by nature. I don’t think I’d ever put it together with the family dynamic in which I was raised.

        I’m now much better at having self compassion when I get stressed and fall back into my old habit of putting on what I’ve come to call The Melissa Show (I’m funny and happy! Everything is great! I don’t need any help!). When I feel it starting up, I’m better at stopping and reminding myself that it’s not my job to make sure everyone is happy. It’s okay for me to need help once in awhile. My flaws don’t make me unlovable…in fact it is the flaws themselves that allow people to love me. (But sometimes it’s still so hard! This has definitely been a “progress not perfection” thing for me.)

        Anyway, enough blah blah. I just wanted you to know that you’ve been a blessing in this alcoholic’s life…so thank you for that.

      • Melissa, I can’t seem to reply to your latest comment. Thank you so much. I am glad my words could be comforting to you. Your Lulu persona used to confuse me because there was another blogger named Lou who sometimes called herself variations such as Lulu. But I’m always glad to have you as a reader, whatever name you use!

  3. Annette says:

    Mary it seems that there are so many health issues that don’t make sense. No simple answers anymore. At the risk of sounding paranoid….there are ingredients in our food and the ways that our “natural” food is grown that is not common knowledge (maybe more is being revealed now) that makes even those unhealthy. They contain hormones, and chemicals that do affect us.
    “My girl” has a psychiatrist that I swear has dementia…..she never knows what is going on and every time she needs a refill, we have to call her several times before it actually gets through to the pharmacy. So I am having to push H to even call the dr. Then push her to push the dr to get anything accomplished. And all the while I look like a co-dependent lunatic….which is a line I straddle on my best days. LOL
    My schedule has changed drastically and while I have this lull, I need to go back to Adoration. Alone. I went with a friend for awhile, but that took away some of my freedom. Im going tomorrow morning. I love that you are delivering the Eucharist to the homebound. They LOVE seeing you come through their door, I am sure. I know I would! Bless you fo doing that.

    • Go back to Adoration…. and don’t take a friend…. tell her to go on her own time. I share my adoration hour with a young woman who is a very good sharer. We are strangers except for this hour a week. She is absolutely silent for an hour, as I am. I have spent time in adoration with people who breathe heavily, move constantly (with noisy clothes), whisper their prayers outloud, etc. I am very grateful for my silent partner.

  4. Hopester says:

    I love your flower photos. We haven’t had snow in May here this year which is unusual although I’m thankful for its absence. Fresh vegetables are wonderful.

    I only heard about functional medicine recently and it’s helped a friend of mine regain her health. I am leery of taking medications so I do research, too. Thankfully I am only on one medication but it’s interesting that when a person gets a certain age they ask you to bring a list of medications to every appointment with a specialist. I wonder if it’s more the norm that people have a list than don’t?

    Your life sounds full of good things!


    • Hopester says:

      I only put my blog address on there this time so you’d know it was me. I can’t seem to change my username to reflect that.

      • Thank you for including your blog address. I stopped blogging for so long, I really don’t remember. I have now visited and will include a link – on a day when I have more time than today.

    • Yes, healthcare professionals seem dumbfounded when I tell them I don’t take any medication. But that is no longer true 😦

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