Last week Thursday I found myself in a bit of a scary mess. Running around like a nut as usual, I found that I had left the house without my phone. I was at a medical appointment, and rifled through my tiny purse looking for my phone. I went back home and found the phone, but later in the day, I realized I was missing the envelope containing $500. that had been in my purse earlier. I spent the rest of the day not knowing where the money was. I did find it later, but it was a horrible feeling to not know for a full work day and then adoration.
I went and visited my boss and told her I need a mental health day. I feel like I need a mental health LIFE.
I took Friday and tried to be slow and deliberate about everything. I did run a few errands, but then I also read a lot. I sat in the sun. I took a nap. All the things that make life good.
The fence got fixed on Friday night and Saturday. I put a 4 hour limit on my work on Saturday and my neighbor ended up working on it for nearly 10 hours. I feel like I owe her the universe. I am going to make her a meal later this month, pack it in a picnic basket and bring it to her. I don’t know what else to do. I feel indebted to her. I am projecting that she is feeling resentfulness towards me. I hate that this fence has made our relationship uncomfortable for the first time in 13 years.
I can’t go fast anymore. I just can’t. I get nervous and anxious and then I lose my mind. I have to kick it down to a nice slow 3rd gear. Not overdrive. Not 4th, and definitely not 5th.
This is part of why I haven’t been blogging. It takes a lot of time.
And now, I am two minutes late for my workout.
Adios, have a beautiful day if you can. If you can’t, try to sit for a minute and rest in the knowledge that God loves you. (That helps me in troubled times.)