There is too much good stuff going on and I am completely and totally overwhelmed. I have a migraine too. My left eye is swollen and dripping, which is what happens when I have a migraine. I feel brain damaged.
The friend who was the best man at my first wedding, now 44 years ago, is coming to have lunch with me. I cannot wait to see him. We have stayed in touch all these years. I have written about him before. His friendship means the absolute world to me. I hope that once I get out of this house I will chill out and enjoy our time together.
My nephew, who I adore, is in town and is coming for Easter brunch tomorrow. I was not going to cook, but now I am. I feel completely unable to cook right now, but hopefully tomorrow I will be able to get to Easter Mass and still have brunch on the table at 11 or shortly thereafter.
My neighbor decided to fix my fence today. You all know I love, love, love my neighbor. Her help has been invaluable to me over the years. But this morning I had to go tell her that I appreciate her help, more than words can say, but I cannot cannot cannot help her today. She said that’s OK with her. I can hear her hammering right now and I just have to be OK with that, because there is no way on God’s green earth that I can help her in this state and with my schedule.
Yesterday I spoke up about a co-worker and almost immediately regretted it. I am so worried about him. Once I spoke up, it was like a light bulb for my boss, and his boss, and then the director. Everyone has noticed things, but no one has said anything. I am scared for him. And I am fighting feeling like I betrayed him. I know that there is not one tiniest bit of bad intent, I am just worried and expressed it. But I remember how I felt last year when my co-workers went to my boss – I was devastated and felt so betrayed.
Too many things rolling around in my addled pain struck brain. I know that most of them are not only good, but very good. I will just focus on my breathing and the fact that I am loved.
And thank God for his miracles.