I wish I hadn’t said nothing works this morning. It was like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I drove across town to see my shrink after work this afternoon, who thinks I am fine by the way. On the way home, I stopped at the grocery store to get some sushi for dinner. When I got back to my car, it was dead. Deader than dead. I had no idea what to do. I am so clueless when it comes to cars, it is ridiculous.
I called my daughter, who is not clueless about cars, but she didn’t answer (because she is at work).
I called my neighbor who said she would come and help me. I started arguing with her, but then I thought – what the hell else am I going to do? She diagnosed it as a simple dead battery. A nice gentleman (well, actually , he was a raggedy disheveled man who seemed to not know where he was) came along and offered to jump the car. We got it running and decided to try to get it home.
It kept wanting to stall on the 8 mile jaunt home. The power steering was going out and the lights were going off and coming on. It was terrifying. I have no ability to cope with car problems. I am still shaking.
I bought a new battery, my neighbor installed it, and it seems the problem is fixed. I am still freaked out. I need to pick up my daughter, twin A, at 3 a.m., to drive her to the airport. I was going to drive my car, but I just asked if she minds if I drive her car. She doesn’t want to break down along a road in the middle of nowhere any more than I do, thank God.
The bank app on my phone no longer works due to “improvements” in iOS 7, so I had to walk to the bank and move money around. Thank God it was close.
Sorry, I am trying to decompress, so this is what I am doing instead of calling someone – which is what I should be doing. I wanted to be in bed at 8… must be by 9.
The meeting downtown… oh dear. It is worse than I ever anticipated. They think it is entirely reasonable to take me back. I had a couple of long conversations with those in power, and they are unmovable.
I will trust God that I am where I am supposed to be. I am not going back to that department, so if it comes to that, I just won’t go. It might mean retirement – so be it.
Early in sobriety, I had to learn how to live like a regular human being instead of a drunken drama queen. I remember so well those lessons.
- Everything is as it should be
- Easy Does It
- God is large and in charge
- Sometimes what I think is bad is good
- and vice versa
- It will all work out exactly the way it is supposed to.
I think I am going to start adding daily Mass to my schedule. I need to just determine to do it. I used to do it.
This job is so demanding that I need all the reminders possible that God is in charge and I am just running around like an ant. And maybe I can stop running around like an ant.
I wish I could find some way to repay my neighbor. She doesn’t want anything. Seriously. I will get her a gift card to a garden center. She does love gardening. Oh yeah! She is getting new tulip bulbs this fall = this is going to work!
OK, enough out of me. I won’t post tomorrow because I will be running around (like an ant).