I had lunch with my old boss yesterday. It was pleasant. She was happy to be able to talk to me as a peer rather than an employee. As we took leave, she asked if I am coming to her shower next week, I said I was. And then I added, “I haven’t had time to knit you anything.” She looked so crestfallen, I decided to go to the yarn store last night and try to get something easy, quick, and cheap. She is one who opted to not know the child’s gender, they are the most difficult to knit for! Her colors are orange, green, and yellow. Cute. But the minute that child is born, her one and only color is going to be either pastel pink or pastel blue.
I have a little sketchbook journal beside my bed. I have added little drawings and little entries. It took maybe 5 minutes to read it this morning. I am struck by the fact that I had this 17 month journey into the valley of the shadow of death. It was horrifying. When I got out I was elated, which I think was appropriate. Now I am settling into this being my new normal. It is possibly the best “normal” scenario I could wish for. And, in fact, I feel that it is God’s will because it was never in my plans, and it landed in my lap entirely unexpectedly. That is how I usually find God’s gifts to me.
The first month on this job was really difficult. I had so many personnel issues and some really thorny problems. But we managed to get through those. I kept realizing that these were really different kinds of problems than I had experienced in my old job. I was actually making decisions! I was making recommendations to upper management that were listened to and acted upon. I was not stuck in a cubicle wishing I could disappear. So different! And good.
So, off I shall go into another day of this divine gift. Thank you God!