Dog Shit and Headaches

IMG_5273Can you imagine what a house would look like / smell like if this dog had diarrhea in it all day long?  I would try to describe it, but no words could ever capture the full impact.  Spic and Span is my friend and who needs rugs anyway?

I knew the day would come when I would come down with another migraine.  For the 18 months I was away from the hospital, I had not one migraine.  This morning, after 30 days on the job, I woke up with a migraine.  Oh my, I totally forgot how sick this is.  I am trying to avoid taking imitrex, but I guess if I have to I have to.  For now, I am drinking Gatorade (I have no idea why, but it sounded good) and trying to get up the strength to get in the bathtub and get ready for work.

Yesterday someone I confided in at work betrayed me.  I can’t go into more detail than that.   My boss called me at 5 p.m. and asked me how so-and-so had heard about this-and-that.  I said “I told her.”  She cautioned me to be cautious with so-and-so.  And off I went, into that land I go to when someone tells me I have said too much or the wrong thing to the wrong person.  I am quite certain it is a childhood thing.  I react so very badly.  Driving home, talking to myself, calling myself stupid, swearing to never talk to anyone again so long as I live, etc.  In other words, nuts stuff.  It always does that.  It lasts about a day or so.

I think it is from growing up in a home full of secrets.  The worst thing you could do was talk about something “outside of the family.”  Younger people will not even know what I am talking about because back in the day all the adults were on the same side.  You could not go to a teacher, a counselor, a priest, a nun, a neighbor, without it going straight back to your parents.  And vice versa.  And boy, would you get in trouble for having a “big mouth.”

But honestly, today I am a grown up, I will go to work, I will get in my office.  I will likely not turn on the lights.  I may even close the door.  I will stick close to the people who work in my department.  I will make every effort to be supportive of them.  I will turn my thoughts to others.  And I will stop talking so damn much.

Hopefully when I get home from work today, there will be no dog here.  My daughter voluntarily found somewhere else for him to stay as soon as she heard about the incident of yesterday, and before I said a word to her.  I didn’t need to say a word to her, and I was able to keep my trap shut – thank God.  She felt bad enough for 32 people, and I told her to stop crying because I refused to comfort her!  She knows me well enough to understand what I was saying.

And perhaps I will go to bed when I get home.  And get rid of this sick headache.

I sure say a lot for someone who is going to keep her mouth shut, don’t I?

 

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8 Responses to Dog Shit and Headaches

  1. Annette says:

    This is the place to get it all out. : ) I hope you feel better. You refuse to comfort her…..that one sentence spoke volumes to me my dear. And dog shit in the house, even for a dog lover, is TOO much.

  2. Hope says:

    My DH has that dilemna with imitrex – trying to guage if he needs to take it or not. I hope your migraine goes away quickly either way. He usually feels like a limp dishrag for a day after a migraine, imitrex or no.

    My mother once said to me point blank that what goes on in this house stays in this house after I had opened my mouth on a party line telephone about a fight her and my dad had had in the wee hours of the night. I never thought about it before but you are right – all the adults were on the same side.

    And oh, the dog. I hope it has a nice new home tonight. I thought dog farts were bad but dog diarrhea is so much worse!

  3. marcia says:

    So, to others, after I’m timed of talking to myself, I vent to the left, and vent to the right (of the perceived injury) trying not to pierce the belly of that festering boil that I am getting a resentment over. When I sometimes pierce it anyway, its now a released, oozing boil, but it doesnt make me feel so much better cause for me my expectations and judgment, conceived irrationally, were looking me in my face, yet again… I hate the pesky “operator error” in me !

  4. MC,
    I too grew up in a “secret” house. What I found through introspection and therapy was that talking was a way for me to feel important, special, indispensable. All the while sharing stuff that was not important, too silly for wasting breath and could change at a drop of a hat and make me look unreliable, untrustworthy, and gullible. I then embarked on the journey of becoming a “small talk Master.” It is similar to a chess master, but deals with the concept of being totally curious about the person I am speaking to. I have found that when given the chance, people will talk about themselves a lot. Most are astonished you are even interested. Through it all I have learned how to be compassionate, caring and most of all “a trusted friend.” I think you know that phrase. I rarely use the word secret anymore. It has a really bad taste in my brain. Confidence is a better term. And it has a double meaning and reward.

  5. Kelly says:

    I am so sorry you’re suffering with a migraine. Does imitrex have bad side effects for you? I am lucky that I can take it and, if the migraine goes away, function well for the rest of the day.

  6. Syd says:

    I have dealt with my share of dog shit–in more ways than one. A dog would rather not go in the house–it is just a last resort when there is an upset stomach. Fortunately, there are good rug cleaners on the market. We have an actual dog room which has tile floors and is easy to clean up. Not a favorite thing to do, especially with an impending headache. Hope that you feel better. Regarding confiding in others–I find that it’s best to not do that. I am so very cautious about telling others my business.

  7. atomicmomma says:

    Okay….been out of town and just logged on. Lovelovelove the title of this post.

    I love dogs but dog shit in the house has made me question that love.

    Add a migraine on top of that and well…..you are a resilient woman to even fire up and post. I have suffered from migraines….vomiting and excruciating pain. Imitrex cannot be worse than that but you are a smart lady and you know what your limits are.

    Hugs, love and healing prayers.

  8. It sounds like some of you have assumed that I was caught talking about someone else – gossiping. I wasn’t. I told someone of a plan I had and later found it was something that I shouldn’t have shared.

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