The First Day of the Rest of My Life

IMG_6489My daughter’s dog is back.  He came out with me this morning as I admired the roses.   But let me not dwell on the dog because it is taking all I have not to get upset about this.

I made it out of that office yesterday.  With only smiles, hugs, good wishes, and vows to get together “real soon.”  I was still pretty wrapped around the axle yesterday morning, but God has a way of intervening, I think.

My successor’s computer showed up and the IT guy wanted to install it.  I had the brilliant awakening to the fact that my computer was in the way.  I quickly offered to take it out to my car, along with most of the other belongings I still had there (a couple pairs of shoes, a vase, etc).  That happened at 9 a.m., and it made it so clear to me that I am out of there.  She got her work done and sent out, right on time.  It is NONE of MY BUSINESS.  Never have those words sounded so good.  She asked if I wanted her to copy me on the e-mails, and I said “no, I don’t need them.”

YAY.

I woke this morning with a raging headache, but a  deep peace knowing that that experience is behind me.  I will probably not stop thinking about it or talking about it right away.  I will try though to focus on the wonderful things in my life.

I am on vacation.  A staycation.  My house feels peaceful – well, if any house can be peaceful with a 300 lb. bulldog in it.  I don’t know how much the dog weighs, but it is a lot.  We took him on  a walk this morning which was very nice.

Just the regular life of a regular old suburban woman in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains.  Happy, Happy, Happy.

I am so busy with the Dave Ramsey materials.  I have read all but two chapters of the book included in the kit.  I think there is hope for me.  And I am mulling over and praying about an idea I may have for making some extra money.  It just occurred to me this afternoon, so it is not fleshed out, but I am so excited.  I thought one possibility was being a sample person at Costco, and wasn’t thrilled with the idea.  Dave’s book suggests doing something you love.  Wow.

Thank you to everyone who has been here over the last long while that I was so unhappy.  And when I was so depressed.  I really appreciate those of you who have commented or e-mailed.  It is hard not to feel like the only person in the world when you are in the midst of that kind of protracted crisis, but your words helped me immeasurably.  Thank you.  I really believe comments on a blog are what it is all about.  They are like a tiny little gift someone can give.  We are sharing.  Not just narrating.

Anyway, thank you.  I am sure I will have challenges ahead in my  life, but somehow I think a really really ugly chapter is over.  Truly over.  And I can feel good about working a program, or practicing principles, or being a Christian, or being a humble recipient of the Grace of God (my personal favorite), or whatever you want to call it – whatever it was that got me to not respond in kind.  It took every thing I had – and then some.  But I can feel good about it now.

Phew.

 

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This entry was posted in Depression, Faith, Friends, Gratitude, Work. Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to The First Day of the Rest of My Life

  1. Annette says:

    Awwww this made me cry. I am so happy for you. Already, day 2 and my Dave Ramsey plan is seeming to become derailed.

    • I am still so so so so so excited about the Dave Ramsey plan. Today is my payday, so I have my budget and will go about this an entirely different way! So excited.

  2. Nancy G says:

    I am so so happy that you made it through this week so well! I knew that you would. I am looking forward to hearing about your next “adventure”. And that dog looks to only be about 275! 🙂

    Nancy G in CA

  3. Hope says:

    So, so glad for you!

  4. Kat Stephens says:

    Amen!

  5. daisyanon says:

    Congratulations Mary. I am so pleased for you. Good luck with the finances. It really is amazing how quickly things turn round once we stop the same old, same old, and start getting control. You will be astonished.

    Your struggle in this job has been a real inspiration for me in dealing with my own very trivial trials. I often think of you. Thank you for sharing your life so honestly here.

  6. Syd says:

    You made it out of there with grace to spare. Good for you! And the dog looks to be sweet.

    • It’s interesting to see others’ reactions to this dog. We went out for a walk, some people stopped and asked his name and asked if they could pet him. Others looked horrified and crossed the street (as I would). To me, he looks like a very terrifying nightmare. It is hard to get over that 😦

  7. Pammie says:

    Peace of mind!!! So glad you are starting new / old chapter. You made it through girl!!!!

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