Snow-tastic Wednesday

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This is a picture of my back yard a year ago this time.  Today it is covered with snow, the trees are bare, the tulips are buried beneath inches of white stuff.  It is not supposed to get above 50 degrees for the rest of the week and snow is predicted for next Monday.  This is fricking depressing.

My mood has taken a nosedive if you haven’t noticed.  The taxes started it.  Then the Boston Marathon tragedy.  Then holes appearing in my retirement plans.

I got a phone call yesterday that may have opened a door for me.  But I am tired of getting hopeful and then realizing there is no hope.

I remind myself that I am not steering this ship.  Please God, may I not have my will, but yours.  May I remain open to your whispers in my life and not steam roll past them, waiting for a megaphone and written instructions.

My psychologist told me yesterday that he learned from Columbine.  He said he was traumatized by the endless coverage and his being glued to it.  Afterwards, he limited himself to written reports, not the sensationalized television coverage, of the events of 9/11, the school shootings, etc.  He is doing the same with the Boston Marathon coverage.  I feel like I am overwhelmed with it.  I have had to turn the television off and listen to my Chants CD.  But every time I check facebook, there is more.  Most of my “friends” and “likes” are part of the running community.  It is a community.  We are all shook up.  I had friends there.

After the horror of the loss of life and limbs is my fear of the loss of the freedom of running a marathon.  Please dear God, may we not react so stupidly to this as we have every other attack.  Please let’s not have to take off our shoes for a race.  Let’s not be searched for pressure cookers.  Let’s not ban black back packs.  Let’s not ban spectators.  Evil wins when we do such stupid things.

I would rather live in danger than live in fear.  Truly.  I would.  And my running friends feel the same way.

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6 Responses to Snow-tastic Wednesday

  1. joedalio says:

    Thanks for these excellent words! I love the attitude of not letting negative things like the Boston event stop you from doing the things you love to do. Life’s not worth living if we live in that fear.

  2. Syd says:

    In just about every other country, terrible things and even terrorist things happen on a regular basis. Here we are completely freaked out when horror happens on our soil. Part of that is natural because how can one get used to horror and terror? But the other part is that it is useless to try to protect citizenry from everything. With so many people hating us around the world and some hating others in our own country, it is really no wonder that terrible events happen. I hope that we won’t walk in fear over this. I too think that we simply need to keep moving on just as we have, find those who did it, and bring them to justice. Then go back to as much of a “normal” life as can be lived.

  3. atomicmomma says:

    I haven’t been able to watch the news for the same reason as your colleague here. Having worked at a newspaper in all departments and seeing how the news is “made” I don’t have the stomach for hour after hour of speculation and nonstop video and photos.

    Please know you are in my prayers. Taxes are depressing, especially when you see how much people are paying and yet we still can’t take care of them.

    • I think if I wasn’t forced to “tithe” to the government, I could spend SO much more on charitable contributions that might actually help someone.

      I really have no interest in contributing to things such as the couple billion dollar “high speed rail” project. Years later, not one inch of rail has been laid. Really? People are starving!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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