Just for one day…

IMG_4558I wish I were a “normal” person, with “normal” experiences.  Sometimes I think I should just keep my big mouth shut.  Other people can chat about normal experiences, and should I join in the conversation, I always have some kind of outlandish story to tell.  Unfortunately, the stories are true.

I work with a young woman who finds me endlessly fascinating.  I think in an animal at the zoo kind of way.  She has told me repeatedly that I should write a memoir.  She is young enough to not know that memoirs like mine are a dime a dozen.  She has suggested I publish a coffee table book – just with my photos, no captions or explanations.  She marvels at the fact that I would take a picture of a bus driver’s reflection in the rear view mirror.  I HAD to take a photo of that scene.  While everyone else’s nose was buried in the newspaper or their iPads.



He was scary.  He got out and yelled at people at bus stops and drove through several trees – you know, the branches, not the trunk.   He clearly did not want me to take his picture.  But WHO takes pictures of bus drivers?

Yesterday by this time, I was crying and in an anxiety fit.  My boss had sent out an(other) e-mail ruining my credibility.  And ruining a relationship I had spent months developing.  I confronted her about it, and she admitted she was wrong.  But the damage is done.

I can’t believe I am 61 years old, training a 33 year old girl to be a manager.  While she makes tons of money and I don’t.  She will “go places” while I don’t.

This is not where I should be this morning.

Mary in Africa commented on a reading in the Daily Office.

As far as teaching is concerned, the love of God comes first; but as far as doing is concerned, the love of our neighbour comes first.  …. You, on the other hand, do not yet see God, but loving your neighbour will bring you that sight. — St. Augustine

I would like to quote the whole thing, but I do not have time this morning.  But clearly, this is what I need to ask God to help me with.  Loving my neighbor.  I think that includes my boss 🙂



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14 Responses to Just for one day…

  1. Syd says:

    Sorry that yesterday was tough. Hopefully, the lessons you are teaching her will sink in. I used to remind myself to practice the program principles in every aspect of my life. It was difficult–more than difficult–on some days.

  2. Dave U says:

    Good lord. I can’t believe someone like that is IN CHARGE!
    She’s really lucky that you have principles — and put them into practice.

    • You know what Dave? The “leaders” of today are really not even polite. They have not one shred of what I came to know as leadership. The world has changed so dramatically, I really wish I could retire. I do not belong in this world.

  3. patty says:

    Sending you a big hug. {{{{{{{Mary}}}}}}}}

  4. atomicmomma says:

    That sounds awful Mary. You have a crazy wackadoo boss. It’s official – you had a bad day at work. Hugs and love

  5. Kelly says:

    ah, to have ‘normal’ experiences….what that must be like.

  6. Pam says:

    Hey, you confronted her….YAHOOOO.
    Love thy neighbor is so difficult. That must be why it’s so important.
    You should tell the bus driver that you are taking a weeks worth of stink eye photos.

    • I am really good at confronting – learned it in AA. I am getting better every day , with lots of practice.

      I only had that bus driver once. Although one time I was driving down the road, looked in my rear view mirror and almost screamed when I saw that face! He just happened to be behind me. Yikes.

  7. atomicmomma says:

    Yes….she is an up and comer who steps on people….no stomps on them….to come up in the world. Some things never change. I have seen these people get promoted over and over again. Hang in there.

  8. kberman says:

    Dear Mary, I have read you for years but rarely comment. I am wondering if you have a hobby that could bring you income. I have 18 blogs and 10 FB fan pages but I am earning my income at age 72 from my afghans. My FB fan page, Emotional Sobriety, and my blog, Emotional Sobriety are my 12th step work. I no longer go to meetings because my main problem is depression. I don’t want to live a pretend life that alcohol was my main undoing. Alcohol helped me cope with my depression. And I love being a recovering alcoholic. 36+ years have taught me to stay close to the 12 steps. I am lucky to belong to several strong FB secret groups of others in long-term sobriety. If you’d like to be invited, email me :changemaker.kathy@gmail.com. Your job is your 12th step work for now. Hopefully, it will change soon.

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