Each year I try not to be overcome by the bleakness of winter. This year is no exception. It already feels oppressive, and we are nowhere near the part of the season that I find difficult…. the period between the Epiphany and Easter. Lent is a reprieve of sorts, in the acknowledgement of suffering and waiting.
I had changed my header the other day to a winter scene. I changed it again this morning to a rose of summer. A beautiful rose. How I love them.
This is the time of year I am tempted to go back to the tanning salon. To get my nails done with acrylics or gel – to have sparkling appendages to my phalanges! To purchase (with credit cards) bright clothing in pastels. To go to a warm place in the winter, to sit by a pool or ocean viewing the palm trees swaying in the breeze.
My reality today is that I am working at home (which I truly appreciate), have potatoes cooking on the stove for a breakfast of fried eggs and potatoes, and the fireplace is warming the living and dining rooms. I am wearing the black yoga pants I wear at home all winter, with a long sleeved running top, with a cami underneath to provide a little more warmth. When I stand, I hear the crackle of the breaking down rubber of my old crocs. I am nothing if not glamorous!
I started work at 6, and will be done by mid-afternoon. I have a retirement party to attend this evening. It astounds me to think of knowing her since we were both so much younger. She started at the hospital a few months before me, she was a young social worker, I was a relatively young medical records technician. We always laughed so much together, sometimes to the point of doubling over and crying. We were on the same wave length with our strange and wonderful sense of the ridiculous. I hope to find something other than yoga pants with crocs to wear to the party tonight.
At the end of this year, I really want to find the time to write about something I have been thinking of a lot this year. It was a challenging time for a lot more than just me. Things that were unthinkable just a few years ago have happened. I expect that more unimaginable things will be right around the corner. We have pushed everything to the edge and beyond. We view “cliffs” and keep right on a-going. I have an idea about this, but my breakfast break is over. I hope you all have a wonderful Friday.
A voice was heard in Ramah, sobbing and loudly lamenting: it was Rachel weeping for her children, refusing to be comforted because they were no more. — Matthew 2:18