I bought a new watch yesterday. I have worn a Tiffany watch for the last 12 years. The band broke on my vacation and I don’t feel like coughing up $200. to replace the band. So I bought a $30. watch instead. I think it is so much fun.
I have a new tooth in my mouth, which makes me very happy. But my mouth is so swollen that my smile is still lopsided. Maybe later today I will be able to smile in that open way that isn’t trying to hide teeth. For one who couldn’t afford dental care for so many years, a trip to the dentist is a luxury.
Yesterday morning I looked at my living room and thought “when was the last time you took down those sheers and washed them?” I couldn’t answer because I have no idea. But I know it has been years – eek. So, I got on my ladder, took down the sheers, and threw them in the washing machine. Then I realized I haven’t washed the windows for a while either. So I did that. A few hours later, I had the clean sheers back up. Just for that little bit of effort, my living space looks so much better!
I thought about the fact that I haven’t been treating myself, my life, or my home well. I haven’t been taking care. I have been so laser focused on this job that is making me so unhappy. That note on Monday did something wonderful for me. It switched off the laser focus. If my best efforts get me a note from my boss saying “f*** off!” then I think I shall change my focus.
I have started working out again. I am going to get my house back into the condition it needs to be in. I am going to do things that I enjoy doing. I am going to spend more time with the people I love and less time with those I don’t. I am going to do the little things that used to thrill me so…. like the lights outside in the summer…. I dragged them out of the garage and put them up last night.
Isn’t that festive? It is such a small thing, but it makes my heart glad. I am forcing myself back into the world of the living.
Today I have an eye exam at 9. Can’t wait to get new glasses! I started a flexible spending account, so I have the money for this! Another total and complete luxury! Then a meeting at the hospital where I worked for 17.5 years. Looking forward to that.
Watch yourself, my son, in everything you do, and be disciplined in all your conduct. And what you hate, do not do to any one. Do not drink wine to excess or let drunkenness go with you on your way. Give of your bread to the hungry, and of your clothing to the naked. Give all your surplus to charity, and do not let your eye begrudge the gift when you make it. — Tobit 4:14-16